Don't Just Hack the Guy's Arm Off!
by theladypantera
Summary: A short musing about Kouga thinking on his encounter with Kagome after she removes the tainted jewel shard from his arm near the beginning of the anime/manga. Some of his reflections as he thinks on this strange human, and a peek of what was going on in his head at the time. Well, from my perspective ;-) (Kouga x Kagome) content.
1. Chapter 1

**_Author's Note: Dec 17/18_**

Hey guys, i saw this sitting in my files and thought I'd share it. It started out as me thinking about how Kouga felt the first time he encountered Kagome (it's initially written from the perspective of my Wind & Snow Kouga, but could probably go off into it's own story if it wanted too).

Here's the first part of it. I'll post the next part tomorrow, i'm way too tired tonight, lol :)

 _Thanks for reading and/or reviewing!_

~ lady p.

* * *

 _._

* * *

 **-ooOooOooOoo-**

 _"Kouga! Are you alright?"_

 _"His skin is changing color. The poison from the counterfeit shard is spreading."_

 _"What should we do? We've gotta act fast or he'll die."_

 _"You can't touch him. The barrier around his arm is so strong that it deflected your hand."_

 _"We have to do something, fast!_ "The anxiety and terror turns the miko's scent sour.

Surely he's hallucinating, delirious from the poison. What else can explain Kagome's scent so full of fear, fear _for him,_ even though he'd tried to kill the stupid mutt?

"Let me be, Kagome," A shockwave of pain suddenly spreads through his body. Grunting, Kouga bites back on his molars, clenching his jaw, not wanting to cry out in front of Kagome any more than he has been. Like some kind of fucking weakling.

"I tried to murder . . . InuYasha," barely able to push out the last few words, but needing to know before he dies why she would do this. Why try and save him? After everything he's done, why fight and defend him as fiercely as she had done with the kit that day on the mountain? The day that had shattered Kouga's expectations of everything he had ever planned for his life.

 _"It wasn't your fault! Naraku tricked you, Kouga!"_ her voice rings loud and clear like a soul deep howl reverberating in the chasms of his soul; Kagome's ready forgiveness and concern for his wellbeing, a soothing balm to the jagged pieces of his broken world.

Heavy footsteps get steadily closer.

 _"It seems we were both deceived by Naraku's scheme. If you can hang onto life, there is a way to save you."_

He isn't surprised by the half-demon's suggestion of hacking off his arm, Kouga can feel the dark taint of the fake jewel seeping into his blood, killing him slowly, painfully, from the inside out. And all because he hadn't listened to Kagome when she'd told him, screamed at him, _begged_ him to hear her, to believe her! And what had he done? Like an arrogant whelp that had rutted for the first time and suddenly thinks he knows everything there is to know about females, he'd scoffed at her – scoffed at her! And told her to shut up!

Kouga moans. The cold night winds blow over his half broken body, teasing the flesh open at the gash in his arm as the voices around him fade in and out.

 _"No! There has to be another way! Don't just hack the guy's arm off!"_

Voices debate his life as it slowly seeps from him, but he deserves this, doesn't he? Kagome's words give him the strength to hold onto consciousness, even as the dusty shadows of bat wings flap over his vision, obscuring almost everything from his dimming gaze except _her;_ lustrous dark raven hair that looks almost blue under the light of the partial moon. Her wide soulful eyes drive deep into Kouga's heart, wrapping around him, consuming him, saving him . . . again.

 _"But, Kagome, isn't the sacred arrow able to break the barrier?"_

Someone give that kitsune a chest of fucking gold for his brilliant fucking observations! And if he somehow manages to get out of this with both arms intact, by the kami of fortunes, Kouga's gonna drop that fucking gold, or whatever the hell else he wants, in the little kit's lap himself!

Kouga's heart hammers like a jack rabbit when Kagome raises the arrow above his wounded arm. The glow of power that begins to burn white at the tip is both mesmerizing and terrifying. Then again . . . maybe this isn't a good idea. The arrow descends and the glow of power intensifies, Kouga grunts, squeezing his eyes shut as a strange crackling sensation tears through him, a feeling of being burned from the inside out.

He can see the power behind his eyelids, burning through his retinas, but Kouga refuses to cry out. _This… this is it._ Damn it, if he's going to die, better it be by her hands than anyone else's!

The flash of light growing behind his eyes grows overwhelmingly and exceedingly bright, and suddenly Kouga's flying – soaring – through images of his life like he's running through his territory, fueled with the power of the sacred jewels. Visions of forests and streams, hunts, and sexual exploits stream by in a blur. Chestnut colored eyes tremble with fear, flashing at him through the cacophony of images like lightning flashing across a dark sky. Faster and brighter the sounds and images churn and swirl, rushing past, until everything begins to mesh into an incomprehensible collage of impossible colors and overwhelming sensations that supernova at the back of Kouga's mind, obliterating light and consciousness from his world, before everything goes blissfully, and utterly, black.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/Note Dec 17/18**

Gah! So I stayed up finishing the edits, I couldn't wait, hope you enjoy the rest of it :)

* * *

 **-ooOooOooOoo-**

 **Time Passes . . .**

The massive dark crater gouged deep into the earth stands vigil next to Kouga's fallen form. His tan colored furs mixed with the grey and blacks of his armor give shape to the wolf's battered and beaten body lying motionless against the charred black earth. His injured, outstretched arm caked in blood suddenly twitches, the fingers of his large clawed hand slowly trembling with life. A low, deep moan of pain follows Kouga's return to consciousness. As his eyes slowly peel open the wolf is not surprised to find himself very much alone.

He's not exactly sure how late it is, or when exactly he had lost his battle with consciousness, only that he'd been swimming in strange dreams hazed in colors of blue and pink . . . and something else . . . the images quickly fade as Kouga struggles to hold onto the last slipping threads . . . _a full moon night reflects on water, a passion filled howl rings through the trees, cradled in his arms is_ . . .

 _Fuck._ Kouga moans, the face of the one he'd been with slipping from his mind as surely as the sun had slipped from the darkened sky. He takes a long steadying breath before attempting to rise.

"Argh! Fucken, shit!" Kouga snorts through clenched teeth. Abruptly the wolf lays still, catching his breath. _That fucking hurts_! Damn it, he can't remember ever feeling like such shit in his life, and the wolf has more than a few centuries under his belt. Every part of his body feels like it's just been trampled to death beneath the powerful stampeding footfalls of a herd of giant stags. The wolf's still clearing gaze focuses on his injured arm, willing the pain in his body to pass.

 _That's gonna take time to heal_. What's the most surprising is that he has the time at all. Kouga lays lone and prostrate on the hard cold ground, gathering his strength, his mind racing over the last twenty four hours.

For some inexplicable reason Kagome had saved him, and her holy power had not destroyed him as he had been certain it would. Kouga grimaces, testing his strength again. Fighting back the tremor of pain, he struggles to his knees. Using his arms to lift himself up, Kouga's injured arm trembles slightly with the effort, but holds strong as the wolf finally pushes himself staggering onto his feet with a grunt. Swaying slightly, exhausted from the effort, Kouga's gaze falls across the broken bodies of his fallen brethren.

A deep swell of anger and rage burns inside Kouga's soul, the power of his youkai flashes around him, and the dark primal beast of his being howls within, enraged at the senseless slaughter before him.

 _Kagura murdered my comrades._ Kouga's eyes bleed red. His loathing and hatred for this wind sorceress, and the demon known as Naraku ignites a deep, burning vengeance within the wolf's soul. Grunting painfully, Kouga staggers forward, the strength of his desire drawing power from the two shards still in his legs, humming in his blood.

He trudges forward awkwardly, one slow, heavy step at a time. _I swear I shall take her life with my own hands . . . and that of Naraku._ The cold breezes continue to whip across Kouga's body, blowing his tail into the strong winds as the weight of the dead settles on his shoulders.

A slow wavering pace is all Kouga can manage heading in the direction of his den. His mind an avalanche of thoughts; A need for vengeance in the name of his fallen comrades, retribution for being used like nothing more than a puppet for someone else's sick, demented games! Kouga fights back the low snarl in his throat at the thoughts, snorting air through his flaring nostrils.

He has no idea how long he's been walking when Kouga finally collapses at the bank of a river along the inner most boundaries of his land, not really in the mood to be around anyone. He leans forward, curling his uninjured arm around one bent knee, his gaze falls across the reflective surface of the still water. Kouga knows out of everything that's happened, the thing that he regrets the most that causes him the most pain, is how he'd acted with Kagome. He releases a long, despondent breath, the chaos of his mind quieting as the wolf's thoughts focus on the raven haired beauty that had stolen his senses since he'd dragged her into his den less than ten days ago. How could so much of his world have changed, in such a short amount of time?

 _Damn it, I'm such a fool!_ How could he not have trusted Kagome when she had called out to him?! How cold he'd been with her, brushing her aside like that! The memory fills him with a deep sense of cold shame. And still she had saved him.

Instant warmth spreads through Kouga's chest, feeding his wounded and angry pride a soothing balm of Kagome's tender words. Remembering the glow of her eyes as she'd fought for his life. Him. A monster. A killer of whomever the hell got in his way.

He holds up his arm, looking at the long, dark gash that had laid claim to his partially healed skin since the bird of paradise had torn the shard free from his arm.

 _It's finally healing this time._ Kouga swallows thickly, realizing Kagome must have cured him of the taint slowly spreading into his blood from both the false shard, and the bird of paradise's venomous bite. He shakes his head slowly, completely taken back by the strange selfless priestess and the compassion she had shown him. Because of her, he was healed, completely. He can feel the power of his cleansed and purified blood humming in his veins and pounding in his ears.

He'd been a dead wolf walking since the battle with the Birds of Paradise, and it wouldn't have been long until the others would have scented the poison in his blood. Shards, or no shards, there'd be no way Kouga would be able to defend himself from anyone wanting to claim the Alpha title for themselves, after all, what predator didn't like already injured prey? For the first time in his life, the thought curls a cold feeling deep inside Kouga's heart, instead of the usual heat and excitement such imagery usually provoked in him, even if it was his own.

He gazes up at the half moon, his thoughts becoming quickly consumed with images of Kagome, her eyes, her mouth, the sound of her voice. One after another, the images collide in his mind. He turns them over carefully, examining the mysterious miko from every angle. The human female that has been aching and twisting his heart into a riot of unexplainable emotions since the moment he'd met her. Since the day he died that day on the mountain. There's no doubt the strange mortal woman confuses him, challenging everything Kouga thought he knew of the world; twisting his insides into a mass of fevered knots that collided explosively with all his original beliefs and desires.

Tonight he'd gone to take a life, and she'd given his back.

 _What the hell was she thinking?_ It's not that Kouga minds being alive, in fact, he's rather partial to it. His gaze focuses on the tiny dots illuminating the sky, blinking across the horizon like thousands of wolf eyes gazing from the nether forests, amassing around the half-light of the waxing moon. It'll be full soon, and then the moons glow will be at its brightest, its influence over his demonic nature at its peak.

 _I wonder what it would be like to spend a full moon with Kagome_. The thought is more than enough to inspire instant heat in Kouga's groin that spreads warmth into his body, making him bite back a moan.

Slowly, cautiously, Kouga bends over the still waters of the river. Reaching out he cups fresh water into his large palms and begins washing away the dirt, grime, and blood from his arms and face. It leaves him feeling somewhat refreshed. His gaze becomes transfixed on his reflection in the still rippling river, watching as it slowly stills. His breaths coming in slow, measured beats.

" _Stop it Kouga! I want you to listen to me, please!"_ Twice. Twice she had tried to warn him, had tried to explain, but he wouldn't hear of it, so sure he'd been right. But somehow, some deep part of him had understood, had howled at him to stop and listen to her. To heed the cries of the woman his youkai had claimed as surely as she had stabbed her sacred arrow into his arm and somehow, miraculously, saved his life - and not for the first time.

No. The first and last time Kouga had seen her, his arm had been injured by the wretched bird of paradise and Kagome had saved him from InuYasha's fury. Granted he had kidnapped the miko, but they had worked past that. And, _Fuck!_ How she had held him! Kouga's heart leaps at the memory. He'd gladly have given that stinking bird his other arm if it meant Kagome would nestle his head on top of her thighs again, or wrap her arms protectively around his shoulders like that, gripping him firmly. Never had a simple touch burned so deep or felt so sweet on his skin. A surge of desire hums in Kouga's blood as the memory surfaces, raising the long thick hairs on his tail.

 _I am truly fucked now,_ he snorts. Kouga's gaze flickers across the dark fields of his lands. It had been one thing when Kagome had slapped him and challenged him, all while trying to save the baby kitsune. Her fierceness, loyalty, and love had roared out as powerfully as any she-wolf's howl, awakening his slumbering youkai to her presence, bringing her into his hungry sights.

Then he had struck out against InuYasha, drove his fist through the hanyou's chest and brought him to his knees in a savage, bloody display. True, the enraged power of his youkai had been upon him, but Kouga knows he'd hardly held back, he hadn't wanted too.

Still Kagome had saved him – saved him, when he truly deserved to die this time.

A barked laugh erupts from Kouga's chest unbidden. Here he had actually thought he'd experienced in the past what others had called _love,_ or at the very least, he'd felt very strong attraction and deep feelings of possessiveness – his past lovers could definitely testify as much. Only now is Kouga starting to understand how utterly, totally, and completely out of step he's been his whole fucking life.

Instinctively, Kouga's hand moves to his chest, a finger scratches lightly at the armor, just under his heart. He can feel his youkai, the very essence of who he is, scratching and rumbling inside him, desperate to get free, to be near her. To be close to that source of heat, warmth, and love, to never be separated from that feeling or that light again. Somehow Kagome's touch had healed wounds far deeper than any poison or weapon could ever hope to reach.

Kouga's tail swishes beside him, reflecting his deep, pensive thoughts. The miko's hold over him is complete now, as surely as if they were already mated, for his life now, ultimately, belongs to her – to Kagome, and every particle of his being knows it. The corners of Kouga's mouth turn up into a wry smile at the thought. The first one he's felt since this entire shit-debacle had taken place.

 _In her hands is the only place I ever want to be_ , he grins to himself.

A rustle behind him has Kouga's head turning slightly in its direction.

"What the hell do ya fur balls want?" He growls, hearing the poorly concealed movements of his two betas emerging from the darkening forest behind him.

"Damn it, Boss! How the hell did you hear us?" Hakkaku gripes. He thought they'd been particularly careful this time.

"Yeah, Kouga," Ginta's softer voice breaks through. He moves to stand at his Alpha's side that is seated near the riverbank, looking definitely far more worse for wear. "We even came downwind and everything."

"Keh. Then you two lazy louts better get in some extra stealth training stat, cause you sounded like newborn cubs racing through a bunch of dried-up fucking leaves," Kouga grunts. Alright, it wasn't _that_ bad, but if they're going to stay alive, they need to do better. Birds of Paradise or not, there will always be a new enemy waiting to take a bite or two, to exploit any weaknesses, and the wolf tribes have already suffered too many loses as it is.

"Damn, you look like shit, Boss." Hakkaku at least has the decency to blush, Kouga observes.

"Yeah, thanks for that, I hadn't noticed." Kouga snorts a sarcastic laugh, catching his reflection in the water again.

Ginta jabs Hakkaku in the ribs, giving him an angry glare before squatting down next to his friend and leader.

"Actually, Kouga, you're looking a lot better already. And look, your arm, it's healing!" The beta's eyes grow wide. Hakkaku steps closer to take a look, but not liking the sudden close inspection, a low annoyed growl starts to rumble low in Kouga's throat and immediately the two demon's back off.

Hakkaku's eyebrows arch into his hairline. "Damn, Boss, that's great news!" Kouga's strange injury from the Bird's hadn't healed properly, hinting at the possibility of demonic poison; mostly likely from the bird's nasty fangs. And the thought of a dying Kouga did not sit well with either him or his brother.

"But, howd'ya manage that?" Hakkaku scratches the side of his head, his Mohawk tilting. Demonic poison is not easy to heal from.

"Yeah, Kouga, what happened? And did you see the northern wolves?" Ginta asks, eyes eager and waiting, "Do you know what happened to them?"

At the mention of their fallen comrades Kouga's gaze grows somber, his eyes casting across the dark river that glows with a beautiful, reflective quality to his night vision eyes. "They didn't make it."

"Shit," Hakkaku rumbles under his breath, his crest fallen heart over the loss of so many wolves more than he knows how to put into words.

Ginta shakes his head in quiet disbelief. So much bloodshed . . . and for what? "And your arm?" he finally asks. Their comrades are gone, there is nothing to do now except heal, and keep going.

A soft low rumble starts in Kouga's chest, his gaze flickering between his two oldest friends. "She was there." It's all he has to say for Hakkaku and Ginta to know exactly who their Alpha is talking about. All he'd done since he'd met the strange human miko was sit in a daze, day dreaming about her.

"The jewel was a fake, I was set up, and . . . and she healed me." Kouga holds out his arm a moment, mostly so he can see for himself that the wound, is in fact, healing. "She saved my life," he whispers, still in disbelief.

Hakkaku and Ginta nod their understanding to each other. The strange miko Kouga had kidnapped and brought to the den had indeed caused quite a few unexpected ripples in the ordinary, battle-for-survival, hum-drum of their existence. And the hanyou with that powerful sword of his had turned out to be a much more worthy opponent than anyone could have anticipated.

"And the dog demon?" Ginta asks gently.

" _Inu–Yash-a_ ," Kouga growls the name like it's the most toxic word that's ever passed his lips. "Yeah, he was there too, all of 'em."

Hakkaku settles himself on Kouga's other side. His gaze flickers to his brother for a moment that is already looking back at him. When their gazes meet, it's almost as if they can read each other's thoughts.

"So what now, Boss?" Ginta asks.

"What do ya mean, _'what now?'_ " Kouga turns to his grey haired friend.

"About the northern wolves, we've got to tell their den."

Oh yeah. It's only right that they know what happened to their pack mates. "Send word with first light," Kouga decides, "and send out the welcome to any of them that want to join with us."

"Really?" Hakkaku looks at him curiously.

"Of course!" Kouga growls. "Think about how many females lost their mates! They've lost almost all their warriors! They'll be sitting ducks to any hungry and stronger predators," he growls. He's not going to allow any more wolves to perish on his watch if he has anything to say about it.

"Oh yeah, good point." Ginta puts an index finger under his chin in thought.

"Well hey, that's good for you, right Kouga?" Hakkaku winks, elbowing his Alpha in the ribs.

"What the hell are ya talking about?" Kouga growls, looking at him curiously.

"You know, the northern wolves," Hakkaku grins, a lecherous gleam tinting his eyes.

"Oh, yeah," Ginta chuckles, catching on.

"Have you two louts been at the saké again?" Kouga growls, getting annoyed.

"Geez, Kouga, better not let on that you forgot about her, it might get ya in trouble." Hakkaku smirks, winking at Ginta.

"Her? What her?" Kouga growls low in his throat. "What the hell . . . are . . . you . . ." and like a sudden draft of freezing wind finding itself through the openings of his fur kilt, realization douses the wolf with cold, shocking clarity.

Hakkaku and Ginta grin at each other, somehow they're not all that surprised that Kouga had forgotten about his current, sort-of, go-to-when-the-rutting-need-hit-him, girlfriend.

"Sachi," Kouga moans. With everything that had happened to him over the last half moon cycle the wolf had completely forgotten about the she-wolf who made her home in the northern mountains. Which is one of the reason's Kouga had enjoyed the relationship so much. After they were done . . . visiting with each other, translation: several nights of blood-frenzied rutting, the Alpha wolf would be able to head back to his own territory, and not have to deal with, or worry about, any relationship headaches. Not that he would call what they had a real relationship, they weren't even officially courting, meaning there was no monogamy. It was more a relationship based on convenience and animal lust, than anything else.

"Uh, yeah, Kouga," Hakkaku half grins, knowing exactly who had pushed all thoughts of the beautiful Sachi out of his leader's head.

"Damn it," Kouga runs a clawed hand through his hair. This is the last thing he wants to deal with, especially now. "Well, there's no avoiding it, make the call, I'll deal with Sachi when the time comes." Kouga's gaze narrows on his betas, making sure they understand.

"So does that mean?" Ginta had always known that Sachi wasn't the she-wolf that Kouga would ultimately mate, but she was extremely skilled as a warrior and seductress of men, and she had quite the temper. The beta always had a sneaking suspicion that the she-wolf was more concerned with Kouga's position and power, than the wolf himself. A belief his brother Hakkaku shared.

"You know what it means," Kouga stares hard at his two friends. "My youkai's been claimed."

Ginta and Hakkaku nod silently. There was no controlling who a wolf's youkai claimed when – and if – it suddenly happened. As unexplainable and random as lightning's first strike, and infinitely more powerful.

"Twice." Kouga's voice is so soft when he speaks, his betas almost don't hear it.

"What's that Kouga?" Ginta probes cautiously.

He turns to look at his comrade. The torment of Kouga's clashing thoughts reflects in the dark blue of his iris like a building storm. "Why did she save me, twice?"

Ginta smiles, a wave of affection for his rough and often surly Alpha, who despite his jagged edges, was an honorable leader, a decent wolf, and an even better friend.

"Who knows," Ginta squeezes Kouga's shoulder in an affectionate manner. "Maybe she fell in love with you too," the beta grins, winking at him.

"Keh, don't fuck with me like that, Ginta, it's not funny," Kouga gruffs, shoving back at his friend. Still, Ginta's words have a powerful and consuming affect on him, his thoughts filling with images of green and white, a flurry of raven hair, and eyes that had swallowed his soul. A shudder passes through Kouga's heart.

Gods, if only it were true. If he only had the chance, he'd never give Kagome a reason to doubt his love for her. He'd spend the rest of his life taking care of her, worshiping her, and drenching her body in the throes of sweet ecstasy. He'd draw out moan after penetrating moan, leaving her panting, breathless, and aching for more.

Kouga sighs dreamily, his gaze losing itself in the wide expanse of sky where nothing seems impossible.

 _If only . . ._


End file.
